Unconditionally
by MegannRosemary
Summary: In a moment of fear Regina uses magic, shocking both herself and Henry. She is thrown into the darkness of self doubt and self hatred. Emma there to pick up the pieces of the broken woman and ultimately brings them closer. Swan Queen.


**Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Once Upon a Time nor any part of Unconditionally by Katy Perry.**

**P.S. Listen to the song while you read, it's amazing!**

* * *

_Unconditional, unconditionally_

_I will love you unconditionally_

_There is no fear now_

_Let go and just be free_

_ I will love you unconditionally _

- Unconditionally, Katy Perry

* * *

Fall came quickly this year, the leaves quickly turning a bright red and the persistent wind bringing them down in a wet carpet to cushion the feet of the people in back to normal Storybrooke. Comfortable summer evenings swiftly became crisp dark velvet autumn nights and the residents turned to hearty stews at Grannies or hot apple cider in front of their own hearth.

In the brightly lit mansion on Mifflin Street, two mothers and a constantly chatting son were sitting down to one of their weekly dinners, an occurrence that was quickly becoming almost daily.

Regina set two mugs of hot chocolate in front of the blonde and her son, the chilly evening allowing the exception. She treated herself to a steaming mug of apple cider, with a cinnamon stick to match. She took a deep sip, sighing as the smooth taste hit her tongue, as the warm liquid chased the cold away.

"Wanna sip Mom?" Henry grinned, a white frothy mustache adorning his upper lip.

"It's delicious, thank you, " Emma's smile matched her sons.

Regina had a moment of longing.

She longed to taste the hot chocolate from the blonde's lips.

It would be so easy to lean across the table and swipe a tongue over the sweetness, to cover the lips with her own, sinking into the warmth, the comfort, the fire.

Instead, she motioned to the blonde, eyes twinkling.

Emma turned beet red, her hands flying to the linen napkin in her lap and bringing it to her lips, "Kid, why didn't you tell me!"

He erupted in giggles, clutching his sides, "Because you looked funny."

The brunette chuckled softly, "You were rather amusing dear."

This was new, this teasing they settled into. Their constant jabs had started losing their edge, the sharpness replaced with a different kind of fire. The infuriating blonde woman was constantly turning her life upside down, every single day since she'd stepped into her life, but this was something Regina welcomed.

Most surprisingly, it didn't scare her as much as it should have.

That was the scary part.

"Ew, I got a olive. " Emma shuddered, "Henry, please take it."

"If you eat my tomato, it's got brains squishing out." He dramatically crossed his eyes and stuck out his tongue.

"Your face is gonna stay like that," Emma teased, reaching over to stab a tomato from her son's plate.

"Children stop playing, keep your cutlery to yourself. " Regina smiled affectionately but both Swans knew she meant business. Arms snapped back to their sides and they turned their attention to the offending vegetables.

Some things were clearly genetics, she mused as she watched they both stab dejectedly at their salads, finishing them before they moved on to the sweet and sour chicken. She preferred to move between salad and main meal, a habit from the eighteen years nothing around her ever changing.

"God, this is f..." Emma trailed off, looking between the two brunettes, "This is delicious Regina, thanks." She tucked anther bit of chicken into her already full mouth, her eyes rolling back in ecstasy.

"You're welcome." Regina took pride in her cooking, yet another habit from years of solitude. Pride wasn't the only thing on her mind in that moment. She'd noticed the look on the blonde's face, she wanted to see that look in another context entirely, something more akin to desert.

Henry scooped up the last bite of rice from his plate, "I'm done, can I go read?"

"Help your Mom with dishes first, kay?" Emma glanced over at Regina to look for confirmation she'd said the right thing.

The older woman nodded appreciatively, "You can start clearing the table if you'd like, we'll be in shortly."

"Fine, I call drying!"He raced off with his plate, content he'd gotten his favorite role.

"Ew, that means I'm rinsing," Emma pouted.

Admittedly adorably, Regina thought, if only to herself. "I'm sure you can find a way to amuse yourself Miss Swan."

The blonde just groaned and picked up her own plate to follow their son.

Regina followed, admiring long legs in tight jeans and the cascade of shining hair falling down the other woman's back. This wasn't so new, she'd been mesmerized by the blonde since the first moment she'd laid eyes on her. What was new, was the tantalizing possibility she could act on her feelings, that years of watching form a far could become a physical relationship, a physical relationship that she actually cared for. With a final glance at the beautiful woman beside her, she slipped into bright yellow gloves and started running the water.

Emma grabbed some of the frothing bubbles and stuck them on the back of Henry's neck.

He squealed, swiping them away, "Maaaa, what'd you do that for."

Her heart clutched for an instant when she heard her son call Emma 'Ma', but the feeling quickly dissipated, bringing warmth of the family they'd become instead of the fear that threatened.

"I got the boring job," She winked and bumped her hip with Regina's.

"That's not what I meant when I said you could amuse yourself," She shook her head even as she ginned at the laughter filling her kitchen and at the pleasant feeling to have Emma so close.

They moved to the positions they took when they did the dishes together after their weekly dinners, something that was quickly becoming almost a daily chore. Regina passed the soapy dishes to Emma and Emma rinsed them before handing them off to their son.

The knife slipped from his hand.

They watched it fall in slow motion towards a socked foot.

Emma gasped.

Henry squeezed his eyes shut.

Regina reacted.

Her magic reached out.

Stopped the knife in its tracks.

Brought it safely to its spot in the drawer.

A look of shock crossed Henry's face, not from any physical cut, but from the realization that his mother had used magic. It was the first time since they'd been back from Neverland and she'd been working so hard to keep her promise that she'd make so long ago.

Regina saw the look cross his face and she felt a knife pierce, not from any metal instrument, but from what she read as disappointment from her son. She was flying backwards, headlong into feeling she was the evil queen once again.

She would never be his mother again.

He would never love her.

She was doomed to a future extremely different and all to similar to her own mother's.

Her mother had turned to her magic, ripping out her own heart before magic, before life, could destroy any prospect of love and caring.

Regina ran from the magic, trying to hold on to the love she'd once had, but her heart was only being slowly torn to pieces.

Neither of them would end up with love in their life, her war was only far slower and far more painful.

She couldn't do this, she couldn't be a happy family with Henry.

With Emma.

It hurt too much, she always came up short and she'd always end up alone in the end.

She pulled the gloves from her hands, cursing when they got stuck.

Tears stinging in her eyes, she murmured, "Excuse me," and fled from the room, enclosing herself in the study.

* * *

_Oh no, did I get too close?_

_Oh, did I almost see?_

_What's really on the inside_

_All your insecurities_

_All the dirty laundry_

_Never made me blink one time_

* * *

Emma saw the panic, the years of pain fill the brunette's eyes, that chased her from the room. In those few seconds she saw the older woman's entire life, the torture, the longing, the misunderstandings and the pure hope.

"Henry, you ok?"

"Yeah," He nodded slowly, "Mom saved me."

Emma pasted a smile on her face, "She sure did kid, she's awesome."

"Magic can be used for good," He spoke in awe, realizing only now that the world wasn't black and white. "Like in Harry Potter."

"Yeah kid, it can." She reached out, pulling her son in for a hug. If this is what it took for him to realize it, she was happy.

He was squirming away from her, deciding recently that he was getting to old for that kind of mushy stuff. "Can I go read now?"

"Get ready for bed first and lights out at nine, I'm going to go check on your mom."

"Is she ok?"

"Yeah, she probably just got scared." Though they both knew, it wasn't because of the knife.

"Tell her thanks from me," He wandered out, his mind already thinking about the latest Harry Potter book he was reading.

Emma finished putting away the last few dishes and wiped the counter, leaving the kitchen spotless. She wanted to give Regina time alone as well as not chance getting in trouble for the bubbles adorning various marble surfaces.

She padded down the hall to the study, knocking softly on the door even as she opened it, "Hey you."

The older woman stood staring out the window, into the darkness beyond, the same darkness that filled her, suffocating her. "Emma, you need to leave, take Henry."

"Sorry, I can't. He's already upstairs in bed." She sat down in the chair, curling her feet beneath her. It was the same spot she'd taken a couple years ago when she first met the stunning brunette, that was about the only similarity, so much had changed since then. "Talk to me Regina, what was that look?" There had been so much, so many years in those few seconds. Her heart went out to the other woman and she longed to try and take away even a fraction of the pain.

"It was nothing. You should go." The walls were up, as they had been for many years.

Emma knew they had started to come down, that windows and doors she'd opened had let them get closer. "Too bad, I'm here whether you like it or not."

"I don't." The brunette crossed to the fire, staring longingly as if she wished it would consume her.

Her superpower spoke, she was lying. The blonde didn't call her out on it, she tried instead for reassurance, to soothe the stinging wounds that had been ripped open minutes earlier. "Regina, he's not upset, he says thank you."

"I saw the look on his face." The mask cracked and a tear, shining amber in the firelight, leaked from her eye.

Emma fists clenched and she hugged herself, to keep her from going to the other woman, taking her in her arms and holding her close. "You saw _a_ look, I saw a very different look. You just read it wrong."

She shook her head violently, her chocolate waves fanning out. "He hates magic."

"He hates the things it has done, and so do I." Emma reached out tentatively, "And so do you."

Regina looked up, her eyes opening against the pain, the blonde hitting the nail on the head.

"You're not your mother Regina, you used your magic to save Henry, not punish him."

The brunette shook her head again, squeezing her eyes shut. She couldn't stop the tears from escaping and flowing down her cheeks.

"We both know the difference, we don't see you as the evil queen, we only see Regina. We see a mother, a powerful woman, a strong woman, a woman who's been through more in her life time that anyone should be subjected to in a hundred lifetimes. It's time you started seeing yourself as who you've become, who you really are."

"Stop , you don't know what you're talking about. You don't know me and you don't know Henry."

Emma plowed on, the words had been there for weeks now and she was desperate to let them out and show Regina how she felt." Your mother turned to magic instead of love and here you are, fighting always for the little boy you love so much."

Carefully, regally, she wiped the tears from her cheeks as she admitted sadly, "I'm always fighting though, it's so hard. I'm sorry Emma, I just don't..."

* * *

_So come just as you are to me_

_Don't need apologies_

_Know that you are all worthy_

_I'll take your bad days with your good_

_Walk through the storm I would_

_I do it all because I love you_

_I love you_

* * *

Emma saw the exhaustion in her eyes, but there was hope there too. It flickered weakly, but it was there, it just needed a little help. "Believe me I know how hard it is. "

The brunette didn't quite believe her, her hope wavered.

Regina was the first person she believed could truly understand her, she was the first person she could truly open up to about her past. She hoped that speaking the next words would help Regina as much as she knew that they would be helping herself out of the darkness that always plagued her. "I know how the darkness tries to take you back, I know how hard you have to fight. For you, the darkness takes you back to magic, to torture. For me, it takes me to run, it takes me to steal and it takes me to take my own life."

The brunette's dark eyes widened, realizing the implication put forth by the sunny blonde. "I just, I just feel scared, out of control."

Emma chewed on her bottom lip, contemplating how to continue, "I get you Regina, I get scared too, it's easy to fall back on old habits. I'm no saint, I run, I steal, I push people away and I hurt the people I care about. Years of abandonment, of feeling guilty for being alive, of wishing I were dead to save me from the pain and the loneliness , they sent me to a dark, dark place. I was saved for a little bit, with Neal and then with Henry. When they were gone I was sent to the very depth of the darkness, I spent my days running again, stealing again and finding ways to hurt myself when I couldn't hurt the people around me enough. I don't think I truly got out of that darkness until, well until that day we fought over Henry in the hospital. "

"How? Why?" Regina crossed her arms defiantly.

"As much as I hated your guts in that moment, you made me feel worthy of the love of a family. You made me fight for it, no one ever made me fight for it. Everyone before just took it away from me, plain and simple."

"I'm sorry Emma, for all that you've endured." Her hands fell to her sides, reaching out as if wishing to comfort her.

"It's alright, and I mean it. It was pretty damn sucky, but I wouldn't be me and I wouldn't have Henry or you if I didn't have the first twenty eight years of crap. I still have my days when the darkness, the loneliness, the pain and suffering of my past tries to take me away from this. I have you and Henry and even my idiot parents to bring me back. So Regina, I get you. There are going to be days where you get sucked back in to the darkness, to magic and to your past. But we're here for you Regina, that is the difference. "

"You can't mean that." Her eyes were forced shut to chase away the possibility it were true.

"I do." The blonde urged, "You don't need to feel sorry for the past anymore, yeah it was horrible everything you did, but you've punished yourself enough for that. Take your second chance, the one you've given yourself here. Let yourself be happy, let yourself be loved."

"Its hard, it's been so long." The older woman opened her eyes, taking the first step.

"I'll be here to help you, Henry too, every single day, good and bad."

"Why?" The brunette whispered, barely audile over the roar of the fire.

"Because Regina, I love you."

She looked up, guarded and ready to lash out in rage if this was all a terrible trick.

Emma stood up, making her way to where the brunette stood.

She wrapped her arms around her, cupped her cheek to look into her eyes. Light green eyes met dark, open met guarded, warm met cold. "I do love you Regina, with all my heart. You're stuck with me whether you like it or not, it just might be easier if you do."

Suddenly the darkness outside, was only that, a fall evening outside and a steady warmth inside, a white light washing it all away. The darkness in her eyes and in her heart seeped away. She let herself be held, let herself get lost in sea green eyes.

"Let me love you Regina." Emma leaned down, her eyes flicked to full red lips for a second and then she was covering them with her own.

* * *

_So open up your heart and just let it begin_

_Open up your heart and just let it begin_

_Open up your heart and just let it begin_

_Open up your heart_

_Acceptance is the key to be_

_To be truly free_

_Will you do the same for me?_

* * *

Her lips parted and she sank into the kiss.

She relaxed in Emma's arms, tilting her head to let the blonde in.

She was tentative at first, enjoying the sweet soft lips beneath her own.

Then, that little spark that had been dampened for so long caught fire and roared to life.

Her hands came to fist in golden curls, pulling her closer, deeper.

Her breathing grew ragged, and desire, the kind of desire that had been missing for 40 years, pooled in her belly.

She whimpered. She moaned. Her hands raked down the other woman's back.

Emma pulled back, kissing her softly on her lips, her cheek, her nose. "Regina, my love, not now. "

Years of pain told her Emma didn't want her.

"Stop that," Emma kissed her again quickly, "I do want you, just I want to do it right. You're special Regina, I see it even if you don't. "

"Thank you." Feelings of rejection faded and for the first time in forty years, there was respect for her, for her body and for her love. The tears welled up and she lay her head on her shoulder, "Thank you."

"You said that already," Emma teased, bringing them back.

"You're special too, so thank you." She held on, listening to the steady comforting beat of her heart. The blonde warmed her inside and out, just holding onto her kept her safe from the darkness that was always threatening.

They stood there as the fire began to dim and a steady rain began to fall outside.

A small brunette in Gryffindor themed pajamas poked his head in the door, "Moms, its late. You didn't come say goodnight."

Henry.

He was the other piece of the puzzle. Here he was asking for her.

The darkness would tell her that he only wanted Emma, but the pulsing white light told her that her son wanted her too. "We're sorry Henry, we got caught up talking."

The blonde nodded, stepping away from Regina, "We'll come up now, ok?"

She felt the loss immediately, she missed her other half, her white light. Then the blonde took her hand, squeezing reassurace and she was back.

Henry took the stairs two at a time, raving about horcuxes and Dumbledore. At the top her turned back, "Hey Mom, are you ok?"

"I'm alright now, thank you sweetheart." She was, she realized. Like Emma said, they'd be good days and bad days, but in the end, with her family, everything would be ok.

"I'm glad I didn't get hit with the knife, we don't have Madam Pomfery here to heal me."

"Who's that?" Emma puzzled, her face scrunching up adorably.

"From Harry Potter, of course, " Regina teased, bumping hips with the blonde, reminiscent of earlier in the evening.

"Ahh, of course." Emma sweet laugh echoed in the hall.

"I don't mind if do magic like that Mom, it's cool." He looked at the carpet, drawing a pattern with his toes.

"Thank you Henry, I'll do my best," She squeezed his shoulder.

He dashed down the hall and jumped on his bed, "Ready Moms!"

"Kid, you're wired what have you been doing?"The blonde glanced at the clock.

"Reading! Its amazing!" He 'pronounced, bouncing up and down.

"Lie down now Henry," Regina soothed, pulling the blankets up to his chin.

"Can you read me a chapter?" He grinned, his eyes twinkling.

"One chapter , as long as it's not too long."

He pumped his fist in the air as Regina sank down beside him and picked up the heavy tome.

"You have to settle down though bud, its late." Emma ruffled his hair.

He made a face, pushing it out of his eyes, "Ok, but Emma you gotta stay too, Mom is awesome you gotta hear her."

The brunette nodded, giving her the permission the hesitating blonde desired.

"I'm sure she is," She crawled up on the bed, taking Henry's other side.

He sank back, cuddling with them both, "Ok read!"

"Please, " She reminded him, and in her low melodic voice she began. She let the words take her away to another world, another world with magic. Both Swans protested when she finally closed the book, "I'll read some more tomorrow."

"Thanks Mom," Henry lay back, curling onto his side.

Emma scooted off the bed. "Night kid, sweet dreams," She ruffled his hair again and dropped a kiss on his forehead.

"Will you make an omelet for breakfast?" His eyes drooped already.

The kid was smart Regina knew that already, but he was even more perceptive than she gave him credit for. He'd noticed the change in his mother's relationship that night, he'd known that Emma was going to stay over before she did.

"Sure thing," Emma stepped back, letting mother and son have their moment.

"Sleep well Henry, I love you." She kissed his forehead.

He sat up hurriedly, wrapping his arms around her neck, "I love you too Mom."

"Goodnight sweetheart," She tucked him in again before turning on his moon and stars lamp.

"Night," He mumbled, the late hour driving away his excitement and taking him to dreamland.

They stood at the door for a few moments, watching the already sleeping boy.

" Emma"

Two syllables.

They were a love song, a romantic poem, a majestic painting of her feelings

The blonde turned her attention from their son, slowly so as if not to scare her off.

Regina knew the blonde had noticed and she was glad. She might not be able to say the three little words just yet, but at least she knew.

She knew.

She wasn't running.

She was right here in front of her, accepting her all.

She accepted all the terrible things she'd done in her past.

She accepted her love for Henry.

She accepted the person she was here, the life she'd built.

Most of all, she accepted her love and returned it.

"Stay tonight?"Regina breathed in a whisper.

"I'd love to."

She let the blonde lead her down the hall to her room, watching in awe as the other woman shimmied out of her jeans and disappear into the bathroom in her panties and Henley.

"Is there a toothbrush I can use," The cabinet door banged and a clatter of bottles hit the floor. "Oops, sorry!" The blonde called form the bathroom.

"Please, make yourself at home Miss swan," She rolled her eyes, even as she welcomed the intrusion

"Don't worry, I am. Found one!"

Emma was ready first, climbing into the big bed and waiting for the brunette to join her in silk pajamas.

Emma lay on her back, carefully not touching the other woman. She was letting her have space and at the same time, left herself free and open. She had no walls up, she was letting Regina come to her.

God she knew her too well.

Regina watched her for a few moments, no one had ever spent the night in her bed and certainly no one but herself had slept in her bed .

It was terrifying, to have someone see you at your most vulnerable.

Someone.

Emma, wasn't just someone, it felt so right that she should be there.

She curled on her side, putting her hand on Emma's hip tip pull her closer.

She opened her arms and opened her heart.

Legs entwined, breath mingled and hearts beat as one.

Curled together, Emma dropped a quick kiss on her full lips, "Night Regina."

"Good night Emma."

And so it began.

* * *

**A/N: So I'm supposed to be working on my actual stories but Katy Perry's new album came out and I'm obsessed with this amazing song and it screamed SwanQueen to me (but then what doesn't) and I had to write this. Thanks for reading! **


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